Types of Kinks: A Beginner’s Glossary
You heard a word. Maybe a partner said it, maybe it came up on a podcast, maybe it was three drinks deep in the group chat. And now you’re here, quietly Googling, wondering what it means, and whether wanting to know makes you unusual.
It doesn’t. Curiosity about different types of kinks is one of the most normal things there is. So here’s our plain-English kink glossary: a full list of kinks sorted by category, with no judgement, no jargon, and no blushing required. Just clear definitions and a gentle pointer on where to start if something catches your eye.
Kink vs Fetish: What’s the Difference?
A kink is anything that adds a little something extra to your sex life beyond the conventional, a preference, an activity, a dynamic you enjoy. You don’t need it, but you like it. Think of it as seasoning.
A fetish is more specific: a particular object, material, or body part that’s central to someone’s arousal, sometimes essential to it. Latex, feet, leather. The line between the two is blurry, and honestly, most people use the words interchangeably.
The important bit: both are completely normal variations of human sexuality.
The Golden Rules: Consent, Communication, Safewords:
Before the fun part, the seatbelt briefing. Everything in this glossary rests on three things.
Enthusiastic consent. Everyone involved actively wants to be there, not just tolerating it, wanting it. Consent is ongoing, and anyone can change their mind at any point, mid-scene included.
Talk first, play second. Kink works best when it’s discussed before it happens. What are you both curious about? Agree your hard limits too, the stuff that’s completely off the table. Naming your limits isn’t unsexy. It’s what makes the rest possible.
Safewords. A word that means “stop, for real”: something you’d never say in the moment, like “pineapple”. Many people use the traffic-light system: green for “keep going”, amber for “ease off”, red for “stop now”. If mouths might be busy or gagged, agree a hand signal instead.
And afterwards, check in with each other. A cuddle, a debrief, a cup of tea. The kink world calls it aftercare, and it matters.
The Main Types of Kinks, by Category:
Power Play: Dominance, Submission & Control:
BDSM — The umbrella acronym: Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, Sadism and Masochism. It covers everything from a silk blindfold on your anniversary to a full leather wardrobe. Nobody has to do all of it — most people pick and mix.
Dominance and submission — One partner takes control, the other hands it over, within limits you’ve agreed together. The secret most people miss: the submissive sets the boundaries, so they hold much of the power. If tying someone to the bedposts appeals, a pair of beginner-friendly handcuffs is the classic first step.
Orgasm control and edging — Deliberately building arousal, backing off, and building again — either solo or with a partner calling the shots. Delayed gratification, weaponised in the best way.
Chastity — Handing a partner control over when (or whether) you get to climax, sometimes with a lockable cage or belt. It’s about anticipation and trust as much as denial.
Pet play — One partner takes on the role of an animal — kitten, puppy, pony — complete with ears, tails, or collars if you fancy. Playful, surprisingly relaxing, and far more about headspace than anything else.
Cuckolding — Finding arousal in watching or knowing your partner is intimate with someone else, with everyone’s full agreement. It only works with rock-solid communication. But for some couples, it really works.
Sensory Play: Touch, Temperature & Tease:
Wax play — Dripping warm wax onto skin for that delicious flinch-and-melt sensation. One non-negotiable: only ever use body-safe massage candles, which burn at a much lower temperature than the ones on your mantelpiece. Regular candles can genuinely burn.
Temperature play — The hot-and-cold game. An ice cube traced along the spine, or a glass toy run under warm water. Cheap, easy, and a lovely first experiment.
Electrostimulation (e-stim) — Using gentle electrical pulses for a tingling, fluttering sensation unlike anything else. It sounds intimidating; it’s actually one of the most controllable sensations out there. Our guide to electrostimulation covers exactly how to start low and slow.
Nipple play — Clamps, suckers, ice, or just fingers. Nipples are packed with nerve endings for every body, and the gear ranges from gentle to very much not.
Tickling — Yes, it counts. For some people it’s foreplay; for others it’s the whole event. One of our bestselling items has always been the humble feather tickler, and there’s a reason.
Impact Play: Spanking & Beyond:
Spanking — The nation’s favourite kink, if our tills are anything to go by. A bare hand is all you need to start; the fleshy lower half of the bottom is the safe zone. Start softer than you think you should.
Paddles, crops, and floggers — Each delivers a different sensation. Paddles give a broad, thuddy smack. Crops are precise and stingy. Floggers, with their many falls, land somewhere between a thud and a caress depending on how you swing. Beginners usually get on best with a paddle.
Sadism and masochism — The S and M of BDSM: enjoying giving sensation that bites (sadism) or receiving it (masochism). In practice, it’s less dungeon-drama and more “a bit of sting makes everything else feel better”. Intensity is entirely yours to set.
CBT (cock and ball torture) — Deliberate, consensual sensation play focused on the penis and testicles, from gentle squeezing to more intense pressure. It’s a wide spectrum, and we’ve written a whole guide taking you from tickle to tease.
Roleplay & Fantasy:
Roleplay — Stepping into characters together: strangers in a bar, boss and new hire, the classic naughty nurse. It gives you both permission to say and do things “you” wouldn’t, which is precisely the appeal.
Uniforms — A subset of roleplay with its own devoted following. Police, medical, maid, military — clothing that carries authority or service, worn or removed.
Praise kink — Melting when a partner tells you how good you’re being. Wildly common, wholesome, and needs zero equipment.
Degradation and humiliation — The flip side: being called names or “put in your place” within carefully agreed limits. It looks harsh from the outside, but negotiated well, it’s an intense trust exercise. Discuss the exact words beforehand. Everyone’s lines are different.
Exhibitionism and voyeurism — Enjoying being watched, or enjoying watching. A quick legal note for the UK: this is strictly a consenting-adults, private-settings kink. Think “watched by a partner”, not “surprising the neighbours”.
Frequently Asked Questions:
Power play (dominance and submission), bondage, roleplay, spanking, and sensory play like blindfolds consistently top surveys of the most common types of kinks. Foot fetishes and a love of materials like latex and leather are the most widespread fetishes. Research suggests around half of adults are interested in at least one.
A kink is a preference that enhances your sex life — enjoyable but not essential. A fetish is a specific focus, like a material or body part, that plays a central role in someone’s arousal. In everyday conversation, the two words are used almost interchangeably.
Yes. A study in the Journal of Sex Research found roughly half of people express interest in at least one kink, making it statistically closer to the norm than the exception. As long as everything happens between consenting adults, a kink is simply part of the natural variety of human sexuality.
The Words Are Yours Now:
That’s the glossary. Hopefully a few of those entries had you thinking “oh, that’s all it means” rather than anything scandalous. Kink isn’t a club with a dress code. It’s a vocabulary, and now you speak it.
Whenever you’re ready to turn reading into trying, our bondage and fetish collection has beginner-friendly options for nearly everything above, or come and say hello in store. The door’s open, and so are our minds.