Turn the lights off first. That’s the whole point of this one. Botanical, curved, sculpted like something grown rather than made, and lit from the inside so the yellow silicone glows through in the dark. It’s a light-up dildo that actually looks good doing it. The Fantasy Plant Dildo is moulded from non-porous liquid silicone with an ultra-soft surface that warms quickly against skin. The tip tapers to a narrow point and widens steadily up the shaft to a full 5.5cm at the thickest part, past sculpted ridges and organic, petal-like texturing. Firm core, soft outside. That combination holds the shape at this girth while still letting the body flex and move with you rather than staying rigid. An LED sits inside the shaft with ten adjustable light modes, from a steady glow to slow pulses and colour shifts. Everything runs off a single control, and it’s USB rechargeable with the cable included. A strong suction cup anchors the base to tile, glass, floorboards or the side of the bath, so you can set it down and go hands-free.