The UK's Largest Sensual Wellness Stores

The UK's Largest Sensual Wellness Stores

4 for 3 on everything using code: 4for3

4 for 3 on everything using code: 4for3

Satisfying Customers for over 25 Years

Satisfying Customers for over 25 Years

Pulse & Cocktails
Next Day Delivery on All Orders

Next Day Delivery on All Orders

FREE Click & Collect in Store

FREE Click & Collect in Store

Discreet Delivery & Packaging

Discreet Delivery & Packaging

Discreet Billing to P&C Trading

Discreet Billing to P&C Trading

10,000+ Nationwide Collection Points

10,000+ Nationwide Collection Points

Check stock in your local store

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Offensive Pens
novelty-2pens.jpg
Offensive Pens
novelty-2pens.jpg

Offensive Pens

£7.95

29.00000 in stock

Select quantity*

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Collect from store

  • Not available for Click & Collect

Express Delivery

  • Guaranteed on Fri 5th Sep
    (FREE on orders over £50)
    £4.95
  • Pickup Point from Fri 5th Sep
    (Select your local collection point at checkout)
    £4.95
  • Saturday Delivery
    £9.95
  • Not available for delivery
  • <b>Collect</b> from your local <b>Pulse & Cocktails Store</b>

    Collect from your local Pulse & Cocktails Store

  • <b>Collect</b> from your local <b>Pickup Point</b>

    Collect from your local Pickup Point

  • <b>Free</b> Express <b>UK delivery (on orders over £50)

    Free Express UK delivery (on orders over £50)

  • <b>Discreet delivery & billing</b> on all orders

    Discreet delivery & billing on all orders

Bored at work? Let your coworkers know how you really feel without saying a word with our wonderfully Offensive Pens.

Product SKU: UEO001

  •  5 Offensive slogan pens.


Slogans include:



  • ‘Actually, just f–k off’

  • ‘Hands off my pen, pr–k’

  • ‘I wish I could f–king spell’

  • ‘Property of C–ty McF–kface’

  • ‘These dull f–kers think I’m working’




Product SKU: UEO001

Play Now. Pay Later

Learn more

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Satisfying Customers for over 25 Years.

Average Customer Rating:

4.8/5