Whether you’re looking for something firm, squeezable, or outright floppy – there is a variety of dildos to pick from: jelly dildos, rubber dildos, latex dildos, silicone dildos, glass dildos, strap-on dildos; some realistic, others the invention of wishful thinking (I’m referring to size here, great big whoppers mainly).
The very fact that the dildo can come in virtually any colour, shape or size goes a long way to explaining why this old classic has never gone out of style, even after the vibrator came on the scene, and still manages to keep the most adventurous of toy users satisfied in 2017.
With so many options, you’d think someone by now would have published a guide book (similar to The Good Pub Guide), but sadly me and you are both still waiting.
In all seriousness, we understand that choosing a dildo, especially your first dildo can feel overwhelming. Don’t worry, we’re here to help and we hope this brief ‘guide to …’ goes a long way to helping.
What is a Dildo?
A dildo is a sex toy that is almost always in the shape of a penis, used for vaginal and anal penetration.
As mentioned in the introduction, it can come in any colour, shape (to an extent, there does need to be a clearly definable shaft for penetration), material, size and style.
Dildos can be used for solo-play or with a partner (remember: couples that play together, stay together).
Lastly, dildos generally don’t vibrate. Of course you can get cock-shaped vibrators that were it not for the vibrating motor would be classified as a dildo but the hard and fast distinction is dildos don’t vibrate and vibrators (unsurprisingly) do.
These are just like the real thing! Unlike the real thing however, it’ll never get tired out and won’t complain when you’re working it too hard.
Not only do they look lifelike, they feel lifelike too; soft skin, thick, veiny and weighty. Lube up and you’ll struggle to tell the difference.
Just like the real thing, they are available in different colours, shapes and sizes. Great for toy users of all experience levels and are very easy to use (as are all dildo types).
To get you started: 6″ Realistic Jelly-Feel Dong
For many an anal dildo usually means a dildo that’s a bit on the small side (both length and girth).
However, just like vaginal sex everyone has a different idea of what is too big. Not only do people differ on what they consider a suitable size, they have different experience levels and want different experiences from their anal sex. Some anal-players are perfectly happy sticking to a dildo not much bigger than a small-to-medium butt plug, others seek more extreme thrills (10″, 12″ dongs, fists, etc).
What all this means is there isn’t really such a thing as an anal dildo, more a dildo that’s going to get used for anal. Just like the body part it’s modelled on, it’s designed for both forms of penetration.
What we do stress when it comes to using a dildo for anal sex is don’t make it your first anal toy, certainly don’t have it be your first anal experience. Start small, try a lubricated finger, or if you prefer, a toy no wider than your middle finger. If you feel compelled to explore more, buy a butt plug or a set of anal beads. If you still feel you can accommodate something larger, then go for a dildo. Take your time, as we said at the start; they predate the vibrator and we can’t imagine they’re going out of style anytime soon.
To get you started: 4.5” Realistic Jelly-Feel Dong
Strap-On Dildos have been a staple of many happy couples’ sex life for longer than we can remember and usually consist of a harness (worn round the wearers waist) with a dildo attached to it (to be inserted inside the receiver). If you’re planning on strap-on sex with your partner, one of these is what you need.
Strap-on’s are popular in BDSM (particularly when used on men) but aren’t limited to dungeon-esque kink and don’t have to involve submission of any kind. Having sex with a strap-on is just as intimate as having sex with nature’s joystick.
To get you started, you can get kits which are easy to use and come ready to wear (the plug ‘n’ play option).
Our best sellers: Realistic 7.5″” Silk Touch Strap-on with Balls
To get you started: Dual Climax Strap-On with Harness
Hollow Strap-On Dildos
These days strap-on’s aren’t just worn by women. The hollow strap-on is just what it sounds like; a strap-on where the dildo is hollow, allowing a penis to snugly fit inside. Yes we’re well aware men already have a penis but that doesn’t negate the fact that hollow strap-on’s can be (sex) lifesavers in addition to being as fun to use as any other sex toy.
Hollow strap-on dildos are often used by men suffering from erectile dysfunction; erectile dysfunction can affect any man, of any age, for a variety of reasons. Since erections are deal-breakers for penetrative sex, men who suffer from erectile dysfunction often shy away from sex altogether.
A hollow strap-on allows the man to insert his penis inside and have penetrative sex even if his penis is completely flaccid. This way, even if the man has a flair up during intercourse, there is no need to stop.
Not to mention the emotional satisfaction both halves of the couple will experience; the wearer joyed they’re still able to play a pivotal role in sexually pleasing the person they love, whilst the other person is not only happy for them but is elated in their own right as it means they’re still able to have enjoyable sex with their nearest and dearest.
To get you started: Hollow Strap-on 6.5 inches
Some people are just addicted to the vibe, that’s cool!
Vibrating dildos, just like their non-vibrating siblings, come in all sorts of colours, materials, shapes and sizes.
To get you started: 7″ Vibrating Realistic “Smooth Touch” Dong
Double Ended Dildos
Two is usually better than one, right? If you think the way we do then you should definitely experiment with double-ended dildos as they’re all about maximising the pleasure for both of you.
We know they can look intimidating to the beginner but you have to remember that you will be sharing (we’ll assume that means a 50/50 split).
Just like all other dildo types, double-ended dildos come in a range of colours, shapes and sizes, some even have one end that gradually widens out so one cock is girthier than the other (ideal if one of you is particularly more accommodating than the other).
Most of them tend to be pretty flexible too, this lends itself to experimenting with double-penetration (simultaneous vaginal and anal penetration).
To get you started: Purple Double-Ended Dildo
Our glass dildos are things of beauty! We think they could go on a display all by themselves and you could just look at them. Of course, the true magic comes when you touch them. Don’t worry – the glass is super tough!
Glass toys are ideal for what’s called ‘temperature-play’ where you either refrigerate the toy (or freeze it for a very short period of time) for the chilled effect or go the other way and heat it up, either sensation will be a new and exciting experience.
Glass does wonders for the G-spot and prostate.
Lastly, they are among the easiest toys to keep clean, ensuring hygiene levels are kept to the very highest of standards.
To get you started: Glass Dildo with ring
How do I use a dildo?
Like with any new sex toys – we recommend you start small, especially if you’re using it for the first time. Don’t take more than you can handle or you risk ruining what could be an amazing experience.
Bear in mind that the average UK penis size is 5 – 6 inches. So, if you’re just getting started you’re best off starting with a dildo that size. Starting with a dildo that is too big will only cause pain and discomfort.
Start slowly, don’t race ahead. Before you do anything – see what the dildo feels like when you rub it on the outside of your body. Use it to massage and stimulate first. Think of it as foreplay!
Don’t forget the lubricant either, to highlight the importance of lubricant rub the un-lubricated dildo very briefly on the outside of your body. If the dildo is made of jelly, rubber, PVC or latex you will notice it doesn’t glide so well. Now imagine that inside your delicate’s. Precisely. Use lube.
(even if the dildo is made from silicone or glass, materials that are a lot smoother, we still recommend using lubricant)
Once you begin to penetrate yourself – go slowly. Take the time to see how it feels, discovering how it’s different to using your own or someone else’s body part.
How do I bring this up?
So you’re thinking “this sounds like fun, I’d enjoy that! But how do I tell my partner?”
It’s OK, we’ve got that covered too. Check out our ‘How to introduce sex toys to your relationship’ guide. Good luck and play-safe.