Anal Sex Science – Why do we like it & should it hurt?


Anal sex used to be seen as the ‘forbidden fruit’ of intercourse, with many individuals holding onto the stigma of anal only being for gay men and the sexually promiscuous.

This, of course, is total rubbish. Anal sex can be enjoyed by everyone, no matter your gender or sexual preferences. Luckily, over the decades the stigma around bum fun has been broken down. More people than ever are enjoying anal sex and experiencing more diverse and exciting sex.

Some people who have never taken part in anal sex may be confused as to why so many people like it. What’s so good about having your bum stuffed and doesn’t it hurt? Well, we’re here to help answer that question.



Why do people like anal sex?

Like any activity, sexual or otherwise, the enjoyment of anal sex is down to personal preference. Some people just enjoy the feeling of being penetrated from another area, others may engage in it because their partner enjoys it. There are numerous reasons we could go on forever about, but that’s a blog for another day.

Let’s get down to the science. In the anus, there are numerous nerve endings which can be stimulated when you are penetrated. For women, vaginal nerves can be stimulated through the anal wall, and for men, the P-spot (prostate) can be stimulated, both causing mind-blowing orgasms.

It is generally down to your individual anatomy and sexual preferences as to whether you will enjoy anal sex or not, but there are also other factors at play. As anal sex drastically reduces the risk of pregnancy during intercourse, some may choose anal over vaginal sex if they are trying to avoid getting pregnant.

This does not mean you shouldn’t be careful during anal sex however, it is still very important to protect yourself and your partner from STDs by using appropriate protection. Wrap it up, people!

Should anal sex hurt?

The short answer is – no! Anal sex, whether it’s your first time or your millionth, should never be painful. Pain during anal sex is often caused when your bum isn’t ready yet for penetration, meaning you can tear and damage the tissue around your anus by going too quickly.

This is why we always recommend lots of lube when partaking in anal sex, and starting small if you’re not used to it. The anal sphincter muscles can hurt when stretched too far too soon, so be patient and start slow.



If you’re looking to try anal, experiment with small butt plugs to get a feel for the stimulation and the size you can accommodate. Here’s a list of some of our favourite beginner products to get you started:

  • 2.5 Inch Silicone Plug. This plug is small, smooth, and easy to insert, perfect for absolute beginners who are unsure about anal penetration.
  • Jewelled Metal Plug Set. These plugs gradually increase in size, so you can work your way up. They are also made from body-safe metal, so if you enjoy cold sensations, this will be right up your street. Don’t worry though, these plugs get to body temperature very quickly.
  • Anal Douche. A must-have for anyone participating in anal sex, a douche helps to ensure proper preparation and hygiene.
  • Anal Lubricant. Lubricant, for any sexual activity but especially anal, is a must. Anal lube can help prevent painful insertion and generally improve your bum stuffing experience.

Ready for anal?

Anal can feel scary for first-timers, so be sure to express any concerns with your partner before trying it. If you want more information on trying anal sex, read our 5 things you need to know before trying anal sex blog.